Becoming a "Grownup"

A few weeks ago I took a huge step towards becoming a full-fledged, card carrying, test passing teacher: I took the Praxis. For those of you not familiar with the teaching world, the Praxis is basically a competency test in which you are tested on your knowledge in your field of studies and targeted area. Naturally, I took the Middle School English language Arts Praxis. Because I'm totally going into teaching Middle School Language Arts! Not. I am going to be a Special Education teacher. So why the MSELA Praxis? Great question! I haven't gotten a clear answer on that as of yet, but the best I can understand is that in order to have my own classroom someday I need to be highly qualified. In order to be highly qualified I need to take (and pass) one of two Praxis tests; either the Middle School Language Arts, or Secondary Math. Math and I don't mix, so I opted for the Language Arts.
As I was driving to Salt Lake City to take my test I started to panic, but my panic had nothing to do with my lack of test preparation or test anxiety. This was more like the panic I had when I turned 17: I was insanely worried about turning 20, which was only three years away. This really caused me a great deal of concern for most of the year I was 17. The anxiety I had on this test day went something like this: I am taking the Praxis. Teachers take the Praxis. You have to take the Praxis before you student teach-I student teach one year from now. Six months after student teaching comes getting a position as a teacher in a school. By myself. As a real teacher. I am nearly a teacher. I am going to be in charge of the education for struggling learners in less than two years. I'm not ready. I don't know enough! Why are they letting me be a teacher?!
At this point my heart was racing about as fast as my thoughts, my palms were sweaty, and I was ready to turn the car around and go home. Then I took a breath and reminded myself that I was only taking the Praxis that day, and that there was still plenty of time for me to learn the things that I need to in order to become a good teacher. This was only a step!
After that I became more excited than nervous about my future. Yes, it is scary to think that within the next two years I will be a full-fledged, card-carrying teacher with my own classroom and students, but by the time that comes I will be ready. There are also some fun things that will accompany this big advance in my life, including moving out and being on my own. I look forward to living in my apartment or cute townhouse with one of my friends, doing the young and single thing, teaching by day and partying by night...it's going to be great!
Growing up is a scary part of life, and I thought that by 25 I would be there and be ready. Even though I am still working on growing up, life is good! Things happen as they need to, and I am getting the preparation that I need to become great in everything that I do. Becoming a "Grownup" isn't as scary as I once thought it was.